It's so the opposite of everything I thought would happen in my life. If you had told me five years ago that 1) I'd spend the first 2 1/2 years of my marriage living in community, or 2) that I'd be married at all by the time I was 25 (I think I was aiming for 40 at that point), or 3) that I'd have a child at 27 and be open to the idea of having more (I was thinking maybe one? maybe?), or 4) that I'd be married, with a kid, and not owning my own home, or 5) that I'd be working in ministry and no longer acting full time, or 6) that I would relocate with barely two weeks of notice, then yeah -- I probably would have laughed in your face.
Five years ago, I had plans of my own. And they didn't involve any of the above-mentioned things.
They also didn't involve God.
But you know what? I love this life -- this life of strange living -- of out-of-the-box thinking -- of focusing each day to live for the glory and delight of God. It's exciting. It's difficult. It's unusual. It's a lot of different things, but mostly: it's freeing.
God tells me again and again in His Word not to worry about the future. Yet I have been a sinful creature plagued by worry -- worrying about going to the grocery store when it's too crowded, or about how we will pay the bills next year, or about what I will wear the next day, or about what people will think of me, or about a million other little and big things. My life was one lived in fear -- of failing, of people, of uncertainty.
But the plans I made for myself -- well, where are they now? And what was it all for? Why did I worry myself sick over things that never came to be?
Oh, friends. Our God is so, so wise. He has so much in store for us, and His plan is much better than what we could possibly anticipate. We certainly can be diligent and prudent, and go in directions that make sense, but we must hold our plans with a lose grip.
Because any day, God could call you elsewhere. He could call you to live in intentional community and be blessed by working through various personality types and relationships. Or He could call you last-minute to live on your own in a beautiful neighborhood. Or maybe He will call you to Ecuador. Or Peru. Or to stay. Right. Here.
But wherever He calls you, don't you want to be able to go and see what His plan is?
I know I do. Because if I had followed my own plans, I would not be married to my best friend and spiritual partner. I would not have my glorious little daughter to wake me up every morning with her joyful smile. I would not be connected to an amazing church family who cares very deeply about us. I would not have grown to know this Jesus so intimately that it leaves me speechless and blushing.
Seriously. If you are living life on your own terms, you are missing out on the life you were designed for.
The life God has for you is waiting.
Will you accept it?
"Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not even one sparrow will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows."
Oh, friends. He loves you so, so much.